I feel I’m getting close to the central mystery of the Polish character. I’m probably completely wrong in this belief but it makes me feel better so humour me. I’ve written recently about the strange behaviour of Polish people on pavements and on the road. I’ve written that I’m very confused by the way that Polish people seem to wander around in a daze without any awareness of the people around them and about the way that they drive as if they were the only person on the road. I’m starting to get the feeling that both of these things point to a fundamental feature of the Polish psyche.
Walking down an average Polish street I observe Polish people trying to walk through each other. It’s almost as if they literally cannot see the people around them, or if they can see them they treat them as ghosts of some kind. When people look into your eyes it’s with an expression of suspicion. For a long time I thought it was just me they were looking at this way, that my foreigness was somehow obvious from my appearance, but I don’t believe that any more. Polish people look at other Polish people with just the same latent suspicion they look at me with. Nobody trusts anybody. Everybody expects everybody else to be a bastard. I got a cold feeling down my spine when I finally saw this.
I remember some wise person making a comment on one of my posts somewhere that said something like “all Polish people believe that all other Polish people are idiots, anti-semites, drunks, thieves, or religious maniacs APART FROM the ones they know.” In other words the average Pole wouldn’t trust another Pole as far as he could throw him unless he was part of his extended family or clique of friends. If I meet an Englishman I’ve never met before my default position is positive; I’m expecting him to be a decent honest bloke. When a Pole meets a Pole he’s never met before it seems the default assumption is precisely the opposite. I find that kind of scary.
It explains a lot. People who work in shops are rude because they assume you’re an idiot or a thief. People fail to get out of each other’s way on the pavement because they assume the other person is a rude and uncivilized person and they are damned if they are going to give way to a rude and uncivilized person. People drive as if they were blind because they literally have no respect for the lives or limbs of the inferior people around them.
It can’t be that simple… can it?
Re: “Everybody expects everybody else to be a bastard.”
Pick your comment:
= Yes. And the Sith shall inherit.
= Yes. But one gets used to.
You’re following the wake of the right ship, Island. But that’s the easy part. The medium part is to guess why Poles are so. The hard part is to decide “do they want to change that?”. The impossible part is to change.
one note
from what I’ve heard it wasn’t always like that
back in the days of communism when everyone faced similar difficulties, I was told, people were very friendly towards one another, very helpful, and trusting.
people then used to know and be friends with their neighbours, and do little favours for one another
and I’ve heard that also from a foreigner who lived here briefly in the 80’s. he said he loved this country then.
and now we have those guarded estates behind fences, security and mistrust. maybe the medium part is the crime wave in the 90s when all authoritarian control fell? or at least one of the contributors
sociologists present please speak out;)
I’m currently translating the memoirs of a 90-year-old Pole who was in Britain in 1940. One of his many interesting (to me as an Anglo-Pole) observations was his utter surprise that wartime Brits assumed a priori that everyone was good and decent and could be completely trusted, unless subsequent experience proved otherwise. Poles, on the other hand, assumed the worst of everyone, and distrusted them until proven otherwise.
Little has changed: I still never get so much as a good morning smile from the staff of my local cornershop in Warsaw, even though I’ve lived here for nearly seven years and go there almost daily, a situation completely inconceivable in the UK. Jesus, sometimes I really loathe this city…
Darth: So why? Is there a simple reason?
Pawel: It would be interesting if that were true. It’s not the impression I get from movies such as Mis or from the series Alternatywy 4 where mutual mistrust seems to be rampant. I’m certainly not saying you’re wrong though.
Sigismundo: Thanks for the comment. You provide frightening evidence that I may be right. I rather hoped I was just being needlessly pessimistic.
Good luck with the morning smile. A source told me that there is and eleven-year-rule in force for the bestowing of smiles on customers; after eleven years you qualify for one, and after eleven years and one day they change all the staff.
Witam,
mam nadzieję, że się nie obrazisz jak napiszę po polsku
Myślę, że nie masz racji odnośnie defaultowego nastawienia Polaków wobec innych Polaków, ja nie zauważyłem czegoś takiego. Przynajmniej jeżeli o mnie chodzi, spotykając kogoś nowego, szczególnie za granicą, cieszę sie że spotkałem rodaka i wcale nie uważam go za złodzieja, pijaka czy głupka. To samo dotyczy Polaków w Polsce, oczekuję że jest to ‘decent fellow’.
Nie wiem kto ci to powiedział, ale może ta osoba obraca się w takim towarzystwie, że musi ‘uważać’
Tak więc ta teoria odpada, szukaj dalej, z chęcią poczytam bo dobrze ci to idzie. Blog ciekawy i masz duzo trafnych spostrzeżeń odnośnie Polaków.
Pozdrawiam
Well, you can always find someone like Piotr in the comment above, who says he never saw the thing so it isn’t true. Generally then, the way I see it — taking peoPoles for bastards is a thing that’s:
– inherent (it’s in our national geneset): no way / little way
– environmental: in the shortage economy the bastard had to be one, because the kind and good-hearted wouldn’t make it through the queues to get that piece of meat. You have to use your elbows, punches or — tricks and swindles.
In Poland today one doesn’t have to race for meat (or gas or toilet paper or stockings), but just goes and buys stuff. The bastard of today will use elbows and / or dirty tricks when one’s a rat-racer. The default picture of Polish community abroad: they don’t stick together, don’t trust one another, they vye and compete.
1) So who’s the non-bastard in Poland? Any no-racer.
2) And when you haver bastards around you, whom can you trust? Family. Fieres, to a point. Now, we don’t wonder why the family thing is so cherished here: a natural source of those who won’t ake you trip and, who knows, who’ll help you.
PS Next time it can’t not work this way, Island. You propose [an explanation], I dispose
The Poles are so “rude” because they live in stress. That’s all. Poland is like a country at puberty right now and there is not much room for the typical US/western “plastic-commercial-smile”.
Give the Poles British or German money ,British or German 100m2 flats, British or German working conditions, infrastructure….and they will smile like a German or Brit.
(there are thausands of smiling Polish waitresses in London or Dublin for example..)
And on the other side put a British doctor to Katowice or Nowa Huta ,give him 1200zl and we will see if he smiles…
huh? days ago this is our topics over a cup of coffee….
that makes me wonder too why hubby doesn’t want me to go out alone or even just drive by myself.
maybe perhaps i look like a dump asian smiling while walking ( smile is a natural to wear in the place where i came from) that at first i find it odd why evryone don’t wear a smile here…even my nxt door neighbor. other reason might be, he don’t trust me or the people around me. whatever i exactly respect there characters.
I might agree. Poles won’t *pretend* that they like other people. At least it’s sincere. I personally know that if I left my cellphone in a public toilet for 15 minutes, I wouldn’t find it when I got back.
Poles also see no need to smile. it’s like I asked myself before talking to someone “am I happy?”. If not, I won’t adopt a dumb smile. Some comedian once said: “Americans call people who always smile ‘happy people’. Poles call them ‘idiots’.” It’s true!
I’m interested to know what a “dump asian” is. Is it a sexual thing?
Only joshing!
The film “Sami Swoj” largely revolves around the topic of Poles not trusting one another and that was made in 1967. The very time when, according to this post, they were all having a love-fest of Polishness. In other words, I don’t think this is by any means a recent phenomenon.
My theory is that Poland has been buggered around so much in the past, giving rise to so many significant opportunities for one Pole to either rip-off, kill, turn-in, or otherwise shaft his fellow Pole, that this mistrust has been slowly developing for centuries.
The UK has always been the UK. Nice and simple. Not really any possibilities for one Brit to be a true Brit and the other a n Austro-Hungarian, German, Jewish, Russian sympathiser. Those deep conflicts, often driven by the simple urge for survival or looking after your family before your country can be very strong forces.
So what about the Ireland, eh?
Aha, ale oczyświcie darthside ma prawo glosić prawdy uniwersalne.
Zgadzam sie, ze Polacy potrafia byc niemili i dla siebie i dla innych. Ale powodem jest jak ktos napisal wyzej, stres, a nie to:
“remember some wise person making a comment on one of my posts somewhere that said something like “all Polish people believe that all other Polish people are idiots, anti-semites, drunks, thieves, or religious maniacs APART FROM the ones they know.” In other words the average Pole wouldn’t trust another Pole as far as he could throw him unless he was part of his extended family or clique of friends”.
To jest czesc, z ktora sie nie zgadzam, bo jest nieprawdziwa.
Ja znam Polakow, bo nim jestem, wiem zatem, ze Polacy tak nie mysla, i nie jestem raczej wyjatkiem.
Jest takie polskie(?) powiedzenie, ze ‘z rodzina to sie najlepiej wychodzi, ale na zdjeciu’ – i jak to sie ma do twierdzenia, ze Polacy ufaja tylko komus z rodziny?
“The default picture of Polish community abroad: they don’t stick together, don’t trust one another, they vye and compete.”
No wlasnie, to mija sie z prawda, to jest mit, zeby nie powiedziec ze to bzdura. Island1 moze to dodac do tych swoich mitow, on to robi?
Polacy zagranica jak najbardziej trzymaja sie razem, jak najbardziej sobie pomagaja. Nochyba ze wezmiemy pod uwage srodowisko przestepcze Polakow za granica, to wtedy ok
Skadkolwiek czerpiesz takie informacje darthside, nie sa one zgodne z prawda, albo co najmniej znieksztalcone.
Piotr,
You gave your POV, I gave mine. The author put a generalisation for consideration. It’s a risky thing to do — since there can always be someone who denies any truth given as universal. (E.g. I can deny the univeral truth “There are Poles” and no one will be able to prove me wrong.)
Similarly, I could give you sources and examples that made me think that “Poles don’t stick together, don’t trust one another, they vye and compete” — but:
(1) what for? you could always say my sources suck.
(2) you’d have to learn some English to read them (and at the same time show some respect to the host here)
Piotr,
if you should insist on using Polish, there something. I know, I know, GW gave the results to imply how gloomy and desparate Polish society under PiS rule felt, but nonetheles, it’s some starting point, won’t you say?
Dear All,
I do recognise Polish people in your posts and I do not.
Let me give you na example.
In my little street ( 9 houses in total) we had not talked to one another very much for years; apart from the occasional dzien dobry we had tended to avoid the neighbours and we had certainly never smiled at passers by.
One day (or rather year or two) everything changed. Perhaps because some very nice people moved in, perhaps because one persistent and rather noisy lady started chatting up everyone who happened to pass her fence, perhaps because we all gradually changed. Nowadays most of us frequently talk over the fence or meet in the middle of the street while sweeping the asphalt (sic); we perform some basic neighbourhood watch and we know a little about everyone who lives here. Perhaps we are a bunch of weirdos or, quite possibly, the so called Polish character and Polish attitudes have begun to alter.
[...] if I didn’t believe that housing stock deficiency is the key to understanding most of the problems Poland faced, faces and will face for quite a time [...]
Dziękuję Ci Piotrze!
Czytam tego bloga od kilku miesięc.I zastanawiałam się czy, aż tacy z nas dziwacy, wredniacy.Ludzie są podobni i jednocześnie odmienni na całym świecie.Island 1 Obalaj mity! i bądź obiektywny.Chociaż pewnie nie jest to Twoim celem.
Dear Anonymous,
You must have noticed the frequent jocular mood of Mr Island and you cannot have believed that what he writes is completely serious!
You are absolutely right – freaks and weirdos are everywhere but the “freakiness” of our fatherland seems to be a little different from that of the other countries ( you may not agree with me, of course). And that is precisely what Mr Island elaborates on.
I had a short talk on Jewish cemeteries a few days ago; I smiled sweetly at all the American students present but, in fact, very few “smiled back” at me. They looked at me with suspicion, which I did not understand. Did they think that a smiling Polish lady, so very different (?) from the gloomy people they encountered in town, had to be mentally disturbed? I have no idea.
J.
Sigismundo, are you absolutely sure that the Brits in the early 1940s were so unconditionally trusting?
As far as I know, the Local Defence Volunteers (later the Home Guard) as well as numerous ordinary citizens treated any person who was knew to the area or spoke or looked a little bit different (an therefore might have been a German spy) as extremely suspicious.
J.
All: I always hesitate before posting these comments about the ‘Polish character.’ The essential truth is that I notice a great difference between Polish people and English people and I feel compelled to understand exactly what it is (it’s not obvious). I know this sometimes causes offense and almost always results in misunderstanding, but I just can’t help it!
This post (like all my posts) was not intended to be a judgment on the Polish character, just an attempt to describe it from the perspective of an outsider.
There is little point in arguing the truth or untruth of perceptions, they are what they are, so I won’t even attempt it. The one truth I’m convinced of is that Polish people often seem ‘rude’ or ‘distant’ to foreigners visiting Poland. I’m only interested in finding out why this is, the question of whether it is has no power, it’s a fact.
I happen to believe that Polish people are naturally polite and extremely hospitable, but this just adds to the mystery of why they seem to be so rude and unconcerned sometimes.
I’ve written more about this on Polandian:
http://polandian.wordpress.com/2008/03/21/myth-1-polish-people-are-rude/
Heh,
I think you’ve hit the nail on the head, island1. I’m a Polish girl living in the US with an English guy. I’m always amazed at his rose-colored glasses descriptions of people he’s just met. He puts strangers on a pedestal and trusts they’re all wonderful people. I scowl at strangers in suspicion and am always pleasantly surprised when people don’t turn out to be the assholes (sorry, American now) I was sure they would be. Must say, I’ve never thought about it as a cultural trait, so much as a deep-seated neurosis. Love your musings.
Dorota: Thanks for the vote of confidence. I’m not sure if it’s better to discover what you thought was a neurosis is actually a cultural trait, or the other way around. Good luck with it either way
Very funny, and spookily close to the mark …
I have found Polish people (generalisation) in Warsaw to be the rudest I have ever come across. Perhaps that is my perception of rudeness … in the end, it’s just my opinion.
Opinions are like arseholes, every one has one, no one cares much for each others.
Culture … such a strange thing
You noticed very interesting things, I’m affraid I have to agree with you!
Love your blog, blease keep up the good work
Ewa: Thanks! Do have a look at Polandian as well, that’s where most of the action is these days.
[...] Comments I read a very interesting post and subsequent comments by Island and his readers about the central mystery of the Polish character. It focuses on the possible mistrust of Poles to strangers as a cause for their rudeness. I gave it [...]
Some very interesting points! I wanted to leave my reply, but I wrote so much that it seemed better to make it a separate post. So I just linked to it as above.
I cite you:
“I’ve written recently about the strange behaviour of Polish people on pavements and on the road. ”
“Walking down an average Polish street I observe Polish people trying to walk through each other. It’s almost as if they literally cannot see the people around them, or if they can see them they treat them as ghosts of some kind.”
—
This is so true – they don’t know how to walk in the street !!! This is irritating me so much. We have a myth in France that says: “the pole is polite and has good manners”… lol so shoked when I saw the reality… We have here some small traveller books (small format, 30 pages) that are supposed to tell us the truth about the country.
No later then 2 days ago, I just had a collision with an old Warsaw guy. Pathetic, he just expected only ME to get out of his path…
Anyway, the worst is the absurd underground passage “centrum” in Aleje Jerozolimskie in Warszawa. I’m going through there every damned day, and this is always the same. This is such a huge mess in so close place !!! It’s like a physics simulator of particles collision !!!
The excuse from my colleagues: “you know, this is Poland” like if, as the article says, fault is always from the others.
hum hum
I may offer an expaination: per risum multum potes cognoscere stultum – you can spot a fool by the laughter.
we need to be serious people, don’t we?
but seriosly, there is more. i myself find it difficult co get along if I haen’t been introduced. I just don’t know where to start.
Yael: No later then 2 days ago, I just had a collision with an old Warsaw guy. Pathetic, he just expected only ME to get out of his path…
One of the good Polish manners says that you always make way for older people. This should be on page 1 in your 30 pages long book.
Once others move out of your way you know that you’re old!
I am an American of Polish descent having moved to Europe in the last decade. In the USA Polish are considered backwards idiots as all former East Bloc members are;but, with the Poles, there seems to be something more (they are considered at the bottom of the barrel). No matter what I achieved when my last name was brought up there would always be the “so you are Polish” smurk. I even thought about changing my last name; as all of my American Polish friends have done. When I came to Europe I suddenly came to a reason why the joke about being Polish is so prevalent in so many cultures (from Canada to Mexico to the UK to Europe to America to even parts of South America). Having for the first time met, experienced and lived with Polish born “Poles” I can only say they are “disgusting” in every way. Rude, arrogant, without common sense, void of concern for those around them, totally self-centric/obsessed, greedy, snobby, lazy (mentally) refusing to learn or read about the world around them, and just lacking in EQ and manners, they are shocking. In business, few have ever achieved positions of Fortune 500 leadership and for the previous Good Reasons.
It will take generations for them to change as a people (if ever); until then, be prepared for the continued self-generated negativity that this group of people seems destined to keep perpetuating.
And yes, my last name is “toast.”
On the contrary, it is that simple. I went to get my polish visa at the embassy in dublin and the degree of rudeness is quite numbing. Nobody greets you at any of the counters, the woman who took my passport didnt even tell me how long I was supposed to wait, she just took my passport and wnet away. So I waited, and after what seemed like 15 min, I finally got my passport with visa stamped in it.
Woman at my college ( who is a pole) thinks she has right to shout at people in an unbelievable display of rudeness.
Oh, btw I am Indian
Hi everyone! I’ve found somewhere where there are some people who seem to have found that the Polish seem rude and inconsiderate (that’s my opnion!).
I’ve only recently come accross Polish people – mainly my housemates. I have been very polite, try to make conversation, have put myself out to make them feel welcome, and even try to warn them when they keep leaving the gas heating on permanently – in September!!! – not to do it because the landlord will put the rent up (I have no control over the heating as it’s in their room!). To this I had a bombardment of verbal aggression and abuse, accusations that I was horrible, and that I deserve to be on my own (They know nothing about my life or why I’m single).They treat me as if I don’t exist or matter. They never attempted to make conversation, and only gave me one answer replies when I did anyway. Is this just the way they are? I have been brought up to be respecful and tolerant of other cultures, so why don’t they adopt the same attitude? They wont even meet me half way. They treat me as if I’m nothing. I’m Welsh, speak Welsh, understand the feeling of being ruled and governed by another country – but I don’t hold it against anyone, its happened, and happened a long time ago. Also as I was growing up we had a Chinese student living with us – I learnt and enjoyed a lot! I was hoping they would teach me Polish cooking/recipes and likewise I would teach them to cook Cawl and rarebit.
This is how British people are essentially, and I feel disheartened and dissapointed that this has been my initial experience of Polish people. I hope that this unpleasant experience will not stay with me and that I do meet others who are more sociable and willing to understand and meet half way. Who are more respectful and willing to embrace other cultures and people like us in Britain where we embrace and enjoy and tolerate other cultures.
This is my opinion………and it makes me sad to say it as I have met so many people from all over the world.
So has anyone found any ways around this polish rudeness? I’m dealing with a difficult Pole as we speak! How do you gain their trust?
If the British are so respectful to other culters , then why they throw bricks at Poles and ambush them from behind ? My uncle almost died because couple of jerks from London jumped him and used weapons to hit him in the head .. Also if I’m not wrong England and its people are not liked in the whole Europe or Nothern America.
I am quite upset as I post this. My son married a lovely Polish girl about 3 yrs ago.
I am a Brit, livingin Cyprus, and this year, welcomed 10 of her family here and have found they ignore me, never say good morning, goodnight, please or thank you. Expect me to run them everywhere and babysit their kids without a word of thanks.
So upset and disappointed.
I’m an Australian of Polish descent and have to agree with all the posts so far, because they’re all true. Poles vary, as do Germans or Brits. But if you’re speaking about generalities, then yes, generally Poles are much ruder and more lacking in social graces than, say, an American or Swede. I think Piotr, that it’s hard to see your culture objectively when you’re in it. I’ve had the good fortune of living both in it and outside it. Maybe that’s why I can see the general dispositions of Poles as a people, and unfortunately, yes, they’re pretty ugly to outsiders. As to why? (Takes a deep breath). Multitude of factors – hundreds of years of wars, deprivation, persecution and backstabbing does tend to make it a little difficult to whistle gaily down the street. A history of national literature focused on Poland being seen as the ‘martyr’ country (no one suffers quite like a Pole) also makes it hard to look at the world in a rosy light. The still present general poverty and inferior living conditions (yes, you’re spot on there, guest) would also certainly put a damper in your stride, particularly when you’re bombarded all the time by glossy images of all the things you can’t and probably never will have. There’s also the question of Poland only relatively recently being part of the western economic world, where plastic smiles and meaningless ‘how are you’s’ are branded about feverishly for no good reason at all (oh, hang on, there is the question of making money I suppose – what that has to do with real manners I don’t know, but it certainly gives you the false impression that everyone cares so much more than the grimacing, glowering old Polish till lady who works for a tenth of a comparative western wage and has three kids to support with almost no government assistance). Yes, it’s a wonder Poles are the way they are island1
Finally, I would just like to say (this point has been made earlier on Polandian) that while Poles generally are a dour lot publicly, privately they’re the soul of true hospitality, friendship and politeness. The moment you step over a Pole’s threshold, you’re welcomed not just into their home but into their heart (remember that old Polish line ‘Guest is in the house, God is in the house’). In all my travels I have never come across a culture more willing to bend over backwards for another (provided, of course, you know them personally). The rest of the western world seems to do it the other way round. I don’t know which you’d prefer, but I think I’d take the hand of a true friend over a stranger’s smile any day.
Just a quick little message for Na Prawda about befriending a difficult Pole.
Poles will not befriend easily – as I pointed out in my earlier post, friendship is a much more serious business to a Pole than it is to, say, an American or Australian, where a friend could be someone you hardly know. Friendship to Poles means responsibility. When a Pole lets you into their hearts, it’s like letting you into their family – with all that this entails (because of this Poles have various names for different stages and types of friendship, ranging from what you’d call an acquaintance in the west, to a bosom buddy).
So, firstly ask yourself, are you ready and willing to be a true friend in return, because that’s what will be expected of you. If not, and it may be that this is what this Pole is sensing, forget it. Why does it matter if they’re prickly – the world is not going to universally find you charming and delectable (sorry, that’s my Polish side shining through) and why should it? Poles are simply not interested in being nice to casual acquaintances (yes, I know this is a huge generalisation).
If you are willing to work at it though (and this is quite difficult to address because I don’t know how well you know this Pole) then a way of endearing yourself to a difficult Pole is a lot cheaper than the second suggestion below, but perhaps more difficult. And so we come to plan A – agree with them.
When getting to know a Pole, it’s not whether you’re right or wrong, it’s whether you like them enough to be willing to overlook differences, because essentially you care about the person, not their irritating foibles or outrageous viewpoints (you might not always agree with, or even like, your brother, but you’ll love him nonetheless – it’s in that sort of area). Honest discussion, like food, hospitality and kindness, is a precious commodity that is shared only with people you respect (at the end of the day I don’t give a shit what my hairdresser thinks of socialism, though it might make for an interesting chat, but I do truly care what my friend thinks because I truly care about them) – as such, it has to be earned.
Incidentally, this is what a lot of people mean when they say Poles argue with no reference to the truth or common sense. It’s because when you’re close to someone, you’re never really arguing about the thing you think you’re arguing about; you know them too well for that. And Poles often tap into this when they talk – the emotion beneath the words, with no regard for how preposterous their statements may actually sound like when uttered (and no, Freud was not Polish). I love arguing this way; it keeps my Australian boyfriend on his toes too.
So if your Polish acquaintance is to be convinced that you’re a person worth caring about, then show them you care first and, how do they put it – humour them
If this doesn’t work, go to plan B – food. Never uderestimate the power of food when it comes to Poles – once again, it’s never really about the food (though that’s a delightful side-effect I grant you). Poles see food and hospitality as an important aspect of social bonding – if you care about someone, you feed them. So, invite them round formally for dinner. Make them feel it’s a special occasion and that you sincerely wish their company. Then go home and cook up the biggest spread you’ve ever cooked up so the table groans with food (even if you’ll have to eat left-overs for a week). To a Pole, the measure of your hospitality equals the measure of your heart. Make sure there is alcohol (unless they’re teetotallers, God forbid). And, this is important, serve them. That’s right, none of the western ‘beer’s in the fridge mate’. Play the host properly so that they don’t have to lift a finger.
Of course, a winning combination, and one which no Pole could possibly deny, would be a combination of the two above mentioned methods. After all, who could resist being fawned over and told they’re incredibly clever and witty whilst being offered profiteroles and glazed ham?
Having read both the post and all the comments I started to think about the whole thing, which I find quite right to be honest. Wouldn’t be able to capture it more accurately than Kinga did – yes, Poles are hard to tame, but once you get there you’ll find a degree of loyalty that borders on mania
.
On a side note I tend to be frequent visitor to UK these days, and as surprising as it seems – I sometimes find the British friendliness to be a bit hm… fake? From my very own perspective it just doesn’t seem that right, taking in mind that it doesn’t end on the “how are you?” thing, but goes all the way up, along the lines “that’s a very good report, but I think we could improve the contents a bit”.
All in all, apart from what Kinga has said – it’s a different approach, different way of thinking. And yes, I do smile in shops and find it always amusing that after few seconds of hesitation people smile back.
Re: Szafirowy. British ‘How do you do’s are a bit fake.
No, you read too much into them my friend… they are just social grease… it is ‘oil’ to make the daily bumps of metting strangers more civil and nicer.
It’s just being pleasant… it’s not being rude. A ‘Hi’, ‘hello’, a ‘nod’ or some other slight aknowledgment works just as well.
But this may be an area by area thing. In London and other big cities, forget it. In some of our northern predominently working class cities [liverpool, Newcastle, etc], people are more down to earth and welcoming.